For Love is the most powerful word and action, man was ever taught; Love is what we are and children are the greatest gift of Love.

I have to share this video! 

It's too adorable and these kids are so talented!

Tears were running down my cheek because I was so excited haha!

I don`t think I'll get tired watching this!

Enjoy!

   

For Love is the most powerful word and action, man was ever taught; Love is what we are and children are the greatest gift of Love.

     Second round of Clomid = EPIC FAIL! I feel so helpless and I don't know if I want to keep trying anymore. My side effects this time were so bad! I felt like I was going to die in my sleep. Arrhythmic heart beats and hot flashes, fever and body aches, I just couldn't go through that again but I feel super sad, maybe even a little depressed that we can't conceive another child. Now that I want it really bad I can't have it. 

     I took two PT's and both were negative. You can only take so many negatives and until you start to feel like a complete failure. I don't know what we're missing. My progesterone test showed that everything is normal. I took an OPT and did the baby dance until we can't do it anymore lol! I can try again but the serious side effects of kidney failure and ovarian cancer is seriously freaking me out. Jaa has been supper supportive but there's only so much he can do. We both want this but I feel like I should give up. Ugh! It pisses me off! I start another round of Clomid tonight. I'm still debating. 

    Another thing that makes me angry is finding out that another 17 year old chick that I kind of know got knocked up and she is considering abortion. It was all over her FB! That seriously makes me angry because here I am, ignoring all the possible serious side effects that can potentially kill me just to be able to conceive again! It makes me sad and angry! There's my rant!

    On the good side, we are moving to a new house, a bigger house, our own house :) I'm going back to my nursing job part time mainly because I get so bored at home. Don't get me wrong being a stay at home is great but I need a vacation once in awhile ;)

  

For Love is the most powerful word and action, man was ever taught; Love is what we are and children are the greatest gift of Love.

I don't know what it is but I love this song!

I know I can't take one more step towards you
Cause all that's waiting is regret
And don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore
You lost the love
I loved the most

And I learned to live, half alive
And now you want me one more time

And who do you think you are?
Runnin' round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are?

I hear you're asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
But I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms

And I learned to live, half-alive
And now you want me one more time

Who do you think you are?
Runnin round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are?

Dear, it took so long just to feel alright
Remember how to put back the light in my eyes
I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed
Cause you broke all your promises

And now you're back
You don't get to get me back

Who do you think you are?
Runnin' round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Don't come back at all

And who do you think you are?
Runnin' round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all

Who do you think you are?

Who do you think you are?

Who do you think you are?

     

For Love is the most powerful word and action, man was ever taught; Love is what we are and children are the greatest gift of Love.

            Been a week since I took my last clomid pill (2nd cycle)..Oh my gosh the side effects were so bad this time..so horrible! I felt so sick and nauseous almost everyday for the last 5 days after my last pill! I really hope we get some good results this time I would really like to see a BFP on my PT. It sucks too that PT's are so darn expensive! 

       Well, nothing new really, just same old stuff. Jaa finally finished his fish tank background and the stand he made out of 2x4's and other stuff..a lot of wood and wood chips and saw dust in our basement right now it's pretty crazy! At least he gets to clean it all up :)

       

       Here's one of the pictures of the tank. We didn't get a chance to take a before and after pictures, not even a step by step process. This is the background he made out of styro foam and concrete. Turned out pretty sweet! 

 

        Here's one of my favorite side view picture :) I'm pretty proud of my hubby, and I know he's proud of himself too!

       This is the foundation of the stand Jaa made. It's pretty solid compare to other over priced stands you get from pet stores. The bottom picture is the final picture although he still has to put the doors on the front and apply a few coats of gloss finish. This looks great in person!

  

        So there it is :) It's looks pretty sexy doesn't it? Lol! Well i better wrap this up it's almost 10:30am and I have to take Braelan to preschool. He is so excited! I love that he loves school so much :)

 Take care :)

     

For Love is the most powerful word and action, man was ever taught; Love is what we are and children are the greatest gift of Love.

    Well I said I was going to blog every day BUT that didn't happen! I figured if I do every two weeks or so I would have more things to talk about.

  Ok so last time I wrote something we were in St. Paul, AB staying with Jaa (he was working up there and we got to spend the week with him.) Anyway, he isn't working there for a while because sometime in the middle of the on February 10, 2011 the building they were working on caught fire and burnt down! It sucks because it was almost done!! Make that triple suck! So now Jaa gets to work in town and come home every night! I love it BUT that would mean that once the building in St. Paul is back up (because apparently they are tearing it down and rebuilding it) he will be gone again..and that's probably going to be in the summer time too! *Dislike*

  I finished my first round of Clomid on 02/10/11, I was messed up! I craved food..a lot of food..especially chocolate and blueberry muffin! I was moody! My mood meter went from 'happy' to 'grumpy' in 10 seconds! Oh well..now we know what to expect.

  On 02/16/11 I had to get some blood work done for Progesterone. They want to make sure that everything is normal and that I ovulated. On 02/25/11 my doctor finally had some "appointment space" to see me..well everything is good, thyroid, LH, LSH, Progesterone, all that looks great! So he ordered a PT...my fingers were crossed and all hopes...only to hear a BFN! Ugh that makes me slightly annoyed. So back on clomid again!

  Today is March 2nd and I start my second round of clomid. *Weak yay* Since the blood work came back excellent and further informed me that I ovulated I am confident that it will remain like that this time..we must've just missed the big 'O'..although we did BD almost every night that we're supposed to. I am hoping that this time it will work and we get a BFP! 

  I also have a new obsession..SHOES! Well it's not really "new" I've always been a shoe whore..but my obsession toned down a bit after my son's birth until recently when I discovered "SHOEDAZZLE" !!! I love love love it! Cheap price for really awesome shoes! Anyway, I will post pics of my ever growing shoe collection later on :)

  This is what's going on in my life right now. Braelan is getting bigger and smarter everyday. He can count up to 20 without messing up and he knows the alphabet..heck he is even learning how to spell now! I love it! He makes me so proud and every time he achieves something I always tear up..my little baby boy is growing up and soon he'll be going to school full time!